In 2021, the Olympics took place in Tokyo. All eyes were on the men’s 4×100 relay. Despite having three of the fastest men, disaster struck as the United States failed to qualify for the final. This was because, in the second leg of the race, the baton was fumbled during an exchange. It did not matter that we had the fastest men because the most basic activity in the relay got mishandled.
The Bible provides two racing analogies: The first is found in 2 Timothy 2:2 where the baton is passed between four generations (Paul, Timothy, faithful men and others). The second analogy is of a marathon where we persevere to run the race marked before us (Hebrews 12:2). We also see a caution from Judges 2:7-10 where a generation arose who DID NOT know God. Because of these examples and cautions, we believe that training and discipling the next generation is indispensable. This is why we are so diligent at Grace Life with our kids ministries (nursery, Sunday School, kidz church, Club 45 and VBS). We also see Student Ministry as a time to evangelize and disciple teens and we diligently equip moms and dads to disciple the next generation in our homes. To put it simply, we are evangelistic disciple makers. Today’s message, Wisdom for Sons and Daughters, presents four commands for raising and training the next generation. One command is….
Dad and Mom, parenting is heart work
The goal of parenting is not behavior modification, but heart change (Proverbs 23:15, 17, 19, 24). Heart work vs. behavior modification can be challenging because behaviors and actions do reflect the heart. The temptation is to correct behavior without challenging the inner man, or the thinking from within. However, the Bible instructs us to focus on the heart. Brothers and Sisters, we must be cautious of books, conferences YouTube videos, speakers, or ministries that either explicitly promise or implicitly suggest that their approach is the most faithful way to ensure Christ-centered kids. Parenting is heart work. If all we needed was rules to ensure proper living, Jesus would not have had to die.
Below are Three ideas for heart level parenting:
1. Identity: Parents, if you do not find your identity in Jesus, you will look for your identity in your kids; thus, you will be crushed when they rebel or lifted up with pride when they do right. Additionally, you will manipulate them to make you happy. While children are image bearers of God, they make terrible gods.
2. Gospel: Recognizing that you are unable to create heart change is why parents and children need the gospel. We are not dealing with bad behavior; rather, we are dealing with sin as the underlying cause of the bad behavior. At the time of salvation, the Savior rescues our children from selfishness, saves them from anger, forgives deceit, and enables them to obey and honor their parents. They need the gospel.
3. Gritty Grace: What sustains us in parenting is that while salvation takes place in a moment, sanctification is a process. Parents that give mercy and grace best are the same parents who know they need God’s mercy and grace most.
Parents (and grandparents), are you doing the crucial heart work of pointing your kids to the gospel? To the corporate Grace Life body, are you intentionally guiding the kids and teens you interact with toward Christ?
To listen to or watch this entire video, click on the following links: